Quick one-shot for the longliveianto Birthday One-Shot
No beta: late night rambling that had to get out of my head before bed
Author’s note: Minsky’s is a real showbar in Cardiff. Anything here is based purely on information from their website.
A vision in Marquisette
“I don’t know,” Tosh fretted as she looked at the flyer for the Saturday Cabaret show at Minsky’s. “Don’t you think it’s a bit much? He’s never really been into that kind of thing.”
“Oh come on Tosh,” Gwen complained with a dramatic sigh. “I went there for a hen do a few months back and it was great. Even Jack loves the idea. Now we just have to get Owen on board and we can give the birthday boy a night to remember!”
Tosh looked over to where Ianto was trying to convince Owen for the hundredth time to clean his own bio-hazard bin and decided that a night out to celebrate his birthday couldn’t be all bad.
“Fine,” she conceded, ignoring the squeal of delight from Gwen. “But if Ianto puts us all on decaf, I am blaming you.”
“Thanks Tosh!” Gwen replied before turning to where Jack was watching from his office and giving him a thumbs up.
The megawatt grin he sent them in reply was almost enough to quell the sense of unease Tosh felt over just how well her best friend was going to take the news.
As Ianto grumbled his way past them over to the kitchen for the latest round of coffee, she decided that even if he protested, they were still going. He’d been a bit techy ever since getting caught between a negative and positive rift spike and ending up as immortal as Jack.
Maybe a trip to a showbar for his birthday would be just the thing to get him out of his funk.
“I can’t believe you talked me into this,” Owen groaned as they took their seats on Saturday night. “I mean really Gwen, could you be more cliché?”
“Don’t be such a wanker,” Gwen chastised as their waitress placed a round of drinks and a few shots on their table. “We’re here to celebrate Ianto’s birthday and have a good time,” she reminded him. “Who knows,” she added with a shrug as a group of bridesmaids and a semi-inebriated bride sat down at the next table. "You might even get lucky."
Owen eyed the sparkly gold curtains adorning the stage and snorted. “Not bloody likely,” he muttered under his breath before passing a shot of tequila over to Ianto.
“I tried to talk her out of it mate,” he said as he raised his shot in salute.
“Thanks,” Ianto answered raising his own with a rueful grin. “Something tells me Jack might have had a hand in the proceedings as well.”
Owen grinned back and the two of them drank before slamming their glasses back on the table.
“Where is our fearless leader anyway?” the medic asked. “Somehow I find it hard to believe he would miss, well this,” he smirked, gesturing to where a couple of extremely toned men were setting up a few props on stage, shirtless and wearing little more than tuxedo pants and bow-ties.
“Rift alert,” Tosh suddenly spoke up. “Said he would meet us here after in time for the show,” she added as she took another sip of her glitter bomb.
“Well he better be,” Gwen answered in a huff. “They always make a point of celebrating birthdays on stage, and I don’t want him to miss-“
“No,” Ianto interrupted. “I mean it Gwen. Not for all the bloody whiskey in Wales. Hell no.”
“But Ianto,” she whined, “It’s a tradition and I know you’ll-“
“Don’t be a twat Cooper,” Owen snarked. “Give the man some dignity and back the fuck off.”
“But he’s ruining it,” she complained.
“He’s the one having a birthday,” Ianto answered, his voice deadly calm. “And he’s also the one who will put your arse on decaf for life if you drag him up there.”
“You wouldn’t,” she replied as her eyes widened in horror.
“Try me,” he answered holding her gaze.
“Fine!” she pouted crossing her arms. “But it would have been fun.”
“Somehow I doubt it,” he answered taking a sip of his pint.
“You said drag,” Tosh giggled as she started on her second glitter bomb.
Ianto raised an eyebrow and Tosh giggled harder. “Ooh the eyebrow of doooom. Mr. Jones, should I be scared?”
Ianto tried to fight it but soon he was laughing with her.
“Quiet you lot, the show is about to start,” Gwen hissed causing Ianto to roll his eyes.
“Ladies and Gentleman!” called out a voice as the music started up. “Welcome to Minsky’s! The best showbar in Wales!”
The crowd started to cheer as the MC went through her opening monologue and brought a few members of the audience celebrating bachelorette parties and birthdays onstage. Gwen shot him a pleading look, but Ianto merely mouthed the word decaf back at her and she finally let it go.
Once the opening act started, the group ordered another round and soon even Owen found himself clapping and cheering along. By the third act in, Ianto was checking his phone for messages.
“He’ll be here,” Tosh reassured him hating to see her friend disappointed.
“It’s alright Tosh,” he answered, giving her a small smile of thanks in return. “Most of my birthdays have been shit. Even if he doesn’t make this one, he's got plenty more to make it up to me," seeing Tosh's worried expression he reached out and squeezed her hand in reassurance before clearing his throat to get Gwen and Owen's attention.
"I never thought I would say this," he started as they both turned towards him. "But I’m glad you guys forced me to do this.”
“Cheers mate,” Owen said holding up his glass. Gwen and Tosh quickly followed suit. “You’re a feisty bugger Tea-boy," he added with a smirk. "But you’re ours. Happy Birthday.” The four of them clinked their glasses together as the MC announced the next act.
“And now ladies and gentleman we have something extra special for you,” the MC said as the lights dimmed down to a single spotlight. “One of our very dear friends has come out of retirement for one night only. Here to help someone very special celebrate, is the one, the only, Jacqueline DuBois!”
“Did she just say do boys?” Gwen snickered as the room went dark.
Ianto was about to reply when suddenly the spotlight came back on to showcase the backside of a vision in rhinestone covered marquisette, with blonde hair and a white fur stole draped over her arms.
“Hap-py birth-day, to you,” she crooned low and husky with her back still to the audience. “Hap-py birth-day to you,” she sang again, this time glancing seductively over her shoulder. “Hap-py birth-day, Mr. Jo-ones,” she continued fully turning around to face the audience and drop her stole as she stared straight at Ianto. “Happy birthday, to you.”
“Oh my god,” Gwen gasped looking at Ianto’s stunned face. “Jack?”
“Thanks Mr. Jones,” Jack continued singing to the tune of Thanks for the Memories as he descended the stairs at the side of the stage and made his way towards Ianto. “For all the things you’ve done, the battles you’ve fought and won,” he sang, adding an extra shimmy as he passed by the bachelorette party who cheered in response. “The way you deal, with each snarling weevil, and take care of every one,” he continued as he came to a stop where Ianto stood waiting for him. “I’ll never be able to thank you e-nough,” he finished to a round of applause.
“You’re impossible,” Ianto whispered in awe as Jack smiled back at him.
“And you’re amazing,” he replied. “And this is only the beginning. Happy birthday.”
Ianto grinned and pulled Jack towards him, twirling him back into an impromptu dip before giving him a heart stopping kiss that drove the crowd wild.
“Now that’s what I call a man!” the MC quipped as they came up for air and Jack started fanning himself.
“And now if you’ll excuse us, we have a bit of celebrating to do on our own,” Ianto announced into Jack’s mic before tossing it to Tosh with a wink.
“Don’t wait up kids!” Jack called over his shoulder as the two of them hurried away.
“I wonder if he’ll wear that dress to the wedding,” Owen quipped as they disappeared.
“At least they’re happy,” Gwen said wistfully while twisting her ring.
“To Jack and Ianto,” Tosh saluted as the rest of Torchwood Three raised their glasses to join her. “And may Ms. Jacqueline live up to her name,” she added with a sly smile.
Gwen giggled, Owen made a gagging noise and the three of them clinked glasses, satisfied that their mission that evening had been a success.
Here's a picture of Marilyn in that famous flesh colored marquisette dress covered in rhinestones that she wore to sing President Kennedy Happy Birthday and a modified verse of Thanks for the Memories back in 1962 to give you a frame of reference in case you need it.